3 Tests To See If You’re In Love

Teen and Youth Devotion on Finding Out If you're in love

How do you know if you’re really in love? Is there some magic formula, math equation, or science experiment that can tell you? How do you know when you’ve found the “real deal” and when to just keep looking?

There’s got to be a better way to approach relationships and dating. We’ve come up with three tests to find out if the relationship you’re in or pursuing has the potential to be the real thing.

  1. Test #1 – The Push Test
    The best way to find out if your relationship is true love is by putting it through the push test. The push test takes an honest look at your current relationship and asks, “What is this relationship pushing me toward?” Is your relationship pushing you toward God? Are you challenged to be a better Christian by the person you’re dating? Or does your relationship make you do, say and go places that you’re not comfortable with? Is your relationship pushing you toward your goals? A true relationship headed toward love and marriage will push you closer to God and challenge you to accomplish your goals.

    Stop forming inappropriate relationships with unbelievers. Can right and wrong be partners? Can light have anything in common with darkness? – 2 Cor 6:14

  2. Test #2 – The Church Test
    The church test is a great way to find out if your relationship really is love. The church tests asks if how you act and the things you do around your crush or boyfriend/girlfriend were viewed by your pastor, or even Jesus himself would you be embarrassed? Is your relationship causing you to do things physically, verbally, or any other way that isn’t right? If it is, you need to cut the relationship off. As a Christian, you’ve got the spirit of God living on the inside of you. You should be acting in ways that reflect that new nature.

    Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself – 1 Cor 6:19


  3. Test #3 – The Family Test
    This test asks how your family feels about the person you’re dating. Do they feel that you’re a better person because you’re with them? Or do they see some red flags in your relationship? Do they become worried about your behavior when you’re with that person? If your family has concerns about your relationship, you need to take those to heart. If a relationship doesn’t pass the family test, you should seriously consider calling it off.

    If you honor your father and mother, “things will go well for you, and you will have a long life on the earth.” – Ephesians 6:3 (NLT)

These three tests should help you determine if your relationship has the potential to be true love. Always be sure to spend time praying and asking God about your relationship. Also, don’t be afraid to call off a relationship if it’s not headed in a good direction. Your heart is too valuable to not be protected. Determine today to make good choices when it comes to dating.

If you’re a youth leader, and you enjoyed this devotion, be sure to check out the youth leader lesson on the same topic. We’ve also got a ton of great resources in our youth leader resources section, so check them out!

You Might Also Like

  • Jeff R
    June 10, 2016 at 12:38 pm

    These are not quite right. First, If your relationship is pushing you towards things you wouldn’t normally do, there’s a good chance you’re in love, because you are doing things simply to be with your significant other. If the things you are being pushed towards doing make you uncomfortable, you may still be in love, but it might not be a very healthy relationship. The church test is really dependent on various variables, such as: Are you easily embarrassed? If you are, your embarrassment talking about what you do with your girlfriend/boyfriend may not be a bad thing. If you are embarrassed because what you are doing with them is a sin, then you still might be in love, but again, it’s not very healthy, at least in a spiritual sense. As for the Family test, it has the same flaws as the other ones: It doesn’t really determine if you’re in love, but whether your relationship is healthy. If your relationship isn’t healthy should you call it off? That depends (and no, I’m not talking about adult diapers). If the relation ship is only hurting you spiritually, it may be worth trying to fix it, with the happy result of winning a brother/sister for Christ, and being much happier. If your relationship is hurting you emotionally and/or physically, you are better calling it off.