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love

3 Things That Love Is

Youth and Teenager Devotion - 3 Things Love IsValentine’s Day is just around the corner. If you’ve been out recently, you’ve probably noticed that almost every store is littered with chocolates, balloons, stuffed teddy bears and flowers in anticipation for the holiday. If you’re single, Valentine’s Day can be a little rough. You can feel really left out of all the gift giving and love. However, if you’re in a relationship, it can be rough too. How do you get the ‘right’ present? How do you know if you got ‘enough’ stuff for them. Regardless of your feelings about Valentine’s Day, the holiday is a time that gets us thinking about love. So here are three things that love is.

Love is Complex

Love isn’t something that is easy to define. If you really think about, we all experience love in different ways. Some people experience love in an act of kindness. Others feel loved when they’re complimented, or when someone spends time with them. Others think love is all about doing nice things for another person or giving everyone they run into great big hugs.

Other people see love as an emotion, others a choice. Still others look at love and think it’s romance or your crush asking you to prom. With all of the different ways people experience and define love, we can see that love is really complex. In the midst of love’s complexity, we know that we all will experience love at some point in our lives.

Love is Impossible

God talks about love in the Bible. One of the places that God lays out what love looks like is in 1 Corinthians 13: 4-7.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. – 1 Cor 13:4-7 (NIV)

We can read this verse and feel a little overwhelmed. Here is this big long list of stuff love is, and stuff that love isn’t. It can make you feel like a failure. Who’s really patient and kind when their brother has just stolen the TV remote from them for the 725th time? Who really doesn’t envy when your friend made the football team at school and you didn’t? Who doesn’t boast and make themselves seem better to others than they really are? Who really doesn’t seek their own? Who really doesn’t keep score when others treat them wrong?

If we’re honest, most of us fall short of what love is. We don’t look out for others and we aren’t always kind. The definition of love God shows us in this verse is pretty much impossible for us to live up to. No person can be all these things all the time, and until we realize that we’re not able to love the way that God describes, we’ll never really appreciate the fact that God helps us love.

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In the Bible we see that God has put His love in our hearts. He gives us the love we need to love others. We just have to rely on the deposit of love that God has already placed in our hearts.

And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us. – Romans 5:5 (NLT)

If we’re feeling overwhelmed by how hard it is to love, then we need to focus in on the fact that God has given us the love we need to love others. He’s poured this love in abundance in our hearts. We just have to believe it and tap into that love that’s already there. Here’s a few Tips for Dealing With Mean People

Love is Healthy

If you’ve ever worked out you know that exercise isn’t fun. It’s really hard and it’s a lot of work. However, exercise is something that helps keep you healthy. Sometimes, you’ve got to do things that aren’t fun and don’t feel good to get the results you want in your life. We know this is true when it comes to exercise and eating right. However, part of the reason God tells us to love others is because it’s healthy for us.

God knows that if we harbor a grudge, it has the potential to make us bitter. He knows that if we aren’t kind, we can become ungrateful. He knows that if we envy others we can become discontented with life. God knows us well, He knows the things that are good for us. When He tells us to love, He’s not doing it to make our lives harder. Rather God tells us to love because He knows it helps keep us healthy in our hearts. If we love, we don’t become bitter, we don’t become discontented with what we have. When we love we keep ourselves from becoming ungrateful, hateful and any other habits that are bad for our hearts. God tells us to love because He knows that love is the best way. He knows that it will help us in the long run.

Love is a complex thing, but it’s an area that is worth examining in your life. Are there areas where you’ve let seeds of discontent, anger, envy and other things grow? If so, take the necessary steps to begin the habit of love in your life. Ask God’s help for where to begin and what to do. Begin today to develop the healthy habit of love and see what God can do through you!

3 Tests To See If You’re In Love

Teen and Youth Devotion on Finding Out If you're in love

How do you know if you’re really in love? Is there some magic formula, math equation, or science experiment that can tell you? How do you know when you’ve found the “real deal” and when to just keep looking?

There’s got to be a better way to approach relationships and dating. We’ve come up with three tests to find out if the relationship you’re in or pursuing has the potential to be the real thing.

  1. Test #1 – The Push Test
    The best way to find out if your relationship is true love is by putting it through the push test. The push test takes an honest look at your current relationship and asks, “What is this relationship pushing me toward?” Is your relationship pushing you toward God? Are you challenged to be a better Christian by the person you’re dating? Or does your relationship make you do, say and go places that you’re not comfortable with? Is your relationship pushing you toward your goals? A true relationship headed toward love and marriage will push you closer to God and challenge you to accomplish your goals.

    Stop forming inappropriate relationships with unbelievers. Can right and wrong be partners? Can light have anything in common with darkness? – 2 Cor 6:14

  2. Test #2 – The Church Test
    The church test is a great way to find out if your relationship really is love. The church tests asks if how you act and the things you do around your crush or boyfriend/girlfriend were viewed by your pastor, or even Jesus himself would you be embarrassed? Is your relationship causing you to do things physically, verbally, or any other way that isn’t right? If it is, you need to cut the relationship off. As a Christian, you’ve got the spirit of God living on the inside of you. You should be acting in ways that reflect that new nature.

    Don’t you realize that your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit, who lives in you and was given to you by God? You do not belong to yourself – 1 Cor 6:19

     

  3. Test #3 – The Family Test
    This test asks how your family feels about the person you’re dating. Do they feel that you’re a better person because you’re with them? Or do they see some red flags in your relationship? Do they become worried about your behavior when you’re with that person? If your family has concerns about your relationship, you need to take those to heart. If a relationship doesn’t pass the family test, you should seriously consider calling it off.

    If you honor your father and mother, “things will go well for you, and you will have a long life on the earth.” – Ephesians 6:3 (NLT)

These three tests should help you determine if your relationship has the potential to be true love. Always be sure to spend time praying and asking God about your relationship. Also, don’t be afraid to call off a relationship if it’s not headed in a good direction. Your heart is too valuable to not be protected. Determine today to make good choices when it comes to dating.

If you’re a youth leader, and you enjoyed this devotion, be sure to check out the youth leader lesson on the same topic. We’ve also got a ton of great resources in our youth leader resources section, so check them out!

Help! My Friend is doing bad stuff.

Teen Devotion Youth Devotion

Have you ever had a friend that began making choices you didn’t like? Maybe they started using alcohol or drugs. Perhaps they got into porn or started becoming sexually active. It can be really hard to know what to do when someone you care about starts to make choices that you can see are wrong.

With those thoughts in mind, we’ve gotten a list together of some suggestions to help you when your friend starts doing bad stuff.

  1. Speak into their life – If you have the ability to talk to this friend, do it. See if you can find out why they are making these choices. Don’t yell at them or give them a hard time because of what they’re doing, but be there to listen. Believe that when you talk to them, God will show you something to say that will encourage them to make the right choices. Finally, be careful when you talk to them to not come across as mean or seem like you know it all. Be genuinely interested in what they’re going through and believe that God will use you to encourage them and remind them of the truth.
  2. Pray for them – This can be such a hard thing to do. Many times you want to see instant results. You want your friend to stop what they’re doing and start living right. However, sometimes the best thing you can do for a friend is to pray for them. A great place to start is to pray the prayer that Paul prayed in
    Ephesians 1:17-18 (Message) – “Ask the God of our Master, Jesus Christ, the God of glory – to make you intelligent and discerning in knowing him personally, your eyes focused and clear, so that you can see exactly what it is he is calling you to do…”
    Pray that they will be able to see clearly what they are doing and the plan God has for their life.
  3. Always love them – Sometimes when friends make bad choices they don’t act very kindly to you. They might lash out at you or stop hanging out with you. It doesn’t matter how badly they treat you, you should love them.
    1 Cor 13:7 – “Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance” NLT
    Never give up on friends when they’re making bad choices, instead choose to love them and be there for them no matter how they treat you.

Dealing with a friend who is making bad choices is hard. But with God’s help, you can be a support and help for your friends that are in need. You can love them, pray for them, and even talk to them to encourage them. Regardless if you see results or not, Its important that you choose to love your friend no matter how they treat you in return.

Pray: God, I come to you in the name of Jesus and I pray for my friend. I ask you to open the eyes of their hearts that they might see who you are and how much you love them more clearly. I ask you to help me with wisdom so I know what I should do in this situation and how to help my friend. I believe that you are showing me the right thing to do right now in the name of Jesus, Amen.

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3 Things True Love Is

3 Things True Love Is Teen Devotion Youth Lesson on True Love Dating Sex
We live in a world that gives us all kinds of messages about what true love is.  The TV shows, movies and books we read all portray love in so many different ways. Sometimes with all the different portrayals of love, its hard to really determine what true love is. So the help clear it up, we’re going to talk about three things true love is.

  1. True love looks out for the best interests of the other person – This means thinking about what is best for the other person. Many times, dating relationships are centered around selfish motives. For example, someone might date the starting quarterback in high school because it helps their popularity, or it makes them look good.  This isn’t true love because true love looks out for what is best for the other person. True love puts its own best interests on the back shelf and is looking out for the needs and interests of the other person.

    “Love cares more for others than for self.” – 1 Cor 13:4 (Message)

  2. True love is based on friendship NOT the physical – a relationship based on the physical stuff won’t last. Any relationship should focus on getting to know the other person long before the physical comes into play. That’s why God asks us to wait to have sex before marriage. Its one of the best ways to make sure your relationship will last, because it is based on something deeper than just the physical. Physical attraction isn’t a good judge of love. Attraction can fade, but a relationship built on a solid foundation of friendship will be much more likely to succeed.
  3. True love has its foundation in Jesus – The most important thing in a relationship is the other person’s feelings toward Jesus. If the person you’re dating doesn’t love Jesus like you do, run away from the relationship. It is never a good decision to become involved with someone that doesn’t love God like you do.  This will set you up for lots of heartache in the future.

    “Don’t become partners with those who reject God. How can you make a partnership out of right and wrong? That’s not partnership; that’s war. Is light best friends with dark?” – 2 Cor 6:14 (Message)

The Bible gives us the best picture of what true love is. If you want to really understand what true love is, you will find it by reading your Bible. A good place to start is by reading 1 Corinthians 13, which talks a lot about what love looks like.

Pray: God I thank you for setting up a picture of what true love is in your word. I purpose in my heart to always put you first in my life. Help me be an example of true love to others and to let your love shine through me. Amen.

Recommended Reading:

 

Check out Sex Has a Price Tag: Discussions About Sexuality, Spirituality and Self Respect This is an engaging read with lots of real life examples and fun stats!

 

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Secrets of Getting Along With Your Siblings

Devotion on Getting Along With SiblingsYour brother is at it again. He stole the remote while you went to the bathroom and now won’t let you watch your favorite show. Living with siblings that drive you crazy can be really hard. So, what do you do when your siblings do things that drive you crazy?

A normal response would be to hit your brother, steal the remote and continue watching your TV show. But is that behavior right? In society today, a lot of the things that are considered normal, aren’t right. Just because something is normal doesn’t mean that its the right thing to do. The Bible encourages us to be different. In the Bible, we’re encouraged to love and forgive those who treat us wrong.

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Ephesians 4:32 “Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”

Being kind and forgiving someone when they’ve done you wrong isn’t normal. Normally, people would hold a grudge, use the silent treatment, or try to get revenge. But the Bible challenges us in light of what Christ did for us to treat others with love and kindness.

So when your brother or sister does that thing that drives you crazy, remember to not be normal but different. Choose to love your siblings and forgive them when they do wrong.

If anyone says, “I love God,” and hates his brother, he is a liar; for he who does not love his brother whom he has seen cannot love God whom he has not seen. – 1 John 4:20

Imagine the Possibilities

Devotion for Teens and Daily Bible Verse on ImaginationYour imagination is a very powerful thing. It can bring good or bad things into your life. When I was still single I wanted to be married more than anything else. I was tempted to give up on my plan to remain sexually pure because my wife to be was nowhere in sight. What kept me encouraged was imagining myself married. I would imagine myself happily married and having kids. I imagined myself outside on a nice spring day mowing the lawn and my wife bringing me lemonade while my little kid was playing around the house. One day a few years ago, my wife and I had bought our first house and I was out cutting grass and all this came back to me that I had imagined all this before.

The word “Imagination” is used over a dozen times in the Bible. Most of the time it’s referring to when people have used imagination for sin and evil. This is often true, however, your imagination can also be used for good. Here is a verse that the Bible uses the word “Imagination” in a positive light.
1 Chronicles 29:18 (KJV)
O Lord God of Abraham, Isaac, and of Israel, our fathers, keep this for ever in the imagination of the thoughts of the heart of thy people, and prepare their heart unto thee

The author of this verse, Ezra is writing about a prayer that David had wrote. In the prayer, David is thanking God for all the amazing things He had done for the people of Israel. He prayed that they would keep these things in their imagination, so they wouldn’t forget.

Your imagination is a powerful thing. Its so powerful, that you can’t do anything until you have imagined it first. Anytime you sin, you imagined it first. You see yourself doing it and you associate with the good feelings it might bring if you did it.

Just like this verse says however, you can imagine good things. Anytime the Bible says you can do something even when you don’t feel like you can, imagination plays a part in helping you do it. For example, if you see in the Bible that you can pray and someone will be healed but you’re shy, you need to imagine yourself doing just what the Bible says until you see yourself doing it. Remember you can’t do it until you first imagine it in your mind.

I know a minister who was in the middle of a major building project. He was believing God would help provide for a building for his Bible college and growing staff. The building would costs several million dollars and he felt that God wanted Him to build it without borrowing any money. This minister said that during the building process, he would go to the empty site and imagine it finished. He would go as far as taking empty paint cans and would tie rope from can to can to mark the walls of rooms in the building. He imagined himself opening doors and going into the next room. He wouldn’t allow himself to step over one of the ropes on the ground because in his imagination that was a wall. Several years later the project had been completed and his Bible college was having an opening celebration ceremony. Someone asked him if he was excited to see the finished building. He said he was actually more excited back when he was imagining it because it had become just as real to him then.

You use your imagination everyday. However, challenge yourself to use it positively for God. Imagine yourself doing things we see in the Bible. When it seems like the dreams in your heart are far off and you could never accomplish them yourself, begin to use your imagination for good.

What Lame Christmas Presents Can Teach Us About Jesus

Christmas Youth Group Lesson and DevotionI’m sure we’ve all experienced it, that moment when you’ve been given a bad Christmas gift. It could be the horrible sweater your aunt got you with the huge fuzzy cat face on it. Or perhaps it was the time your grandma gave you socks and underwear instead of the headphones you asked for.

There is always that awkward moment when you’re trying to think of something nice to say. You know you need to thank the person that gave you the gift, but how do you do it? How do you thank someone for a horrible sweater without laughing or seeming disappointed. How do you tell grandma thanks for giving you socks and underwear instead of what you really wanted?

This devo offers no good advice on how to fake excitement when you get a less than amazing gift. However, what this devo does offer you is some insight into the best gift ever given, Jesus.

This Christmas season, no matter how bad your aunt messes up your Christmas gift wish list, there are a few things you can be excited for. The main thing to be excited about is Jesus. See God wasn’t like Grandma who gave you what you didn’t want and didn’t need. He gave us the main thing we were lacking, salvation.

God sent his Son into the world. He did not send him to judge the world guilty, but to save the world through him.  – John 3:17 (ERV)

God could have judged the world. He could have been a rotten gift giver. He could have told us all the things we have done wrong. He could have reminded us of all the ways we didn’t measure up. However, He didn’t do that. Instead he decided to save us from our sins.
So this Christmas, if your aunt gives you a horrible sweater, or your grandma gives you some stupid socks, remember that God gave you an awesome gift. He saved us from our sins. So, if you’ve never made the decision to accept Jesus into your heart and become a child of God you can. Its easy, just follow this prayer. If you have accepted Jesus, then remember to share Him and His love with others this Holiday season. That way, regardless of the gifts you get, you can enjoy knowing that you’ve been made right with God.

Yes, “everyone who trusts in the Lord will be saved.” – Romans 10:13 (ERV)

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What’s the Deal With Sexual Purity?

Teen Lesson on Sex PurityMost likely, your school’s hallways are filled with talk of who is having sex with whom. Possibly there are rumors circling around your job about the latest hookup and break up. With all the talk from your friends, at school and on TV it can really make you question, in this day and age, is sexual purity really possible? Is it even realistic to think that a person could wait until marriage to have sex?

These questions are good ones to ask yourself. Most teenagers if they were honest with themselves are curious about sex. Many people think, ‘what’s wrong with a little sexual exploration and fun?’ The problem is, many people have taken what God says about sex and twisted it. They’ve pushed sexual exploration and removed all sexual boundaries.

Think of it this way. Let’s say that you were finally able to drive a car. Let’s also say that your dad handed you the keys to the car and told you to have fun. Now if you hadn’t had any driver’s education or any prior knowledge about cars, you could really get yourself in trouble. Let’s say that your dad just left you with the car to ‘explore’ and ‘to have fun’ with it. You might end up driving too fast and get in a wreck if you didn’t follow the traffic rules. Without knowing the rules, you could really get yourself into trouble quickly.

That’s a lot like sex. God made it to be a fun thing, but if you just explore it without any boundaries it can lead to trouble quickly. Without the boundaries in marriage that God has set up for sex, you could find yourself pregnant, with an STI or a broken heart. That’s why God urges us to keep ourselves sexually pure. Its not that He wants us to remove all fun from our lives. No, the opposite is true. He knows that if we follow the rules like we do when we drive, it keeps us from wrecking.

Sexual purity is possible. It may not be the easy or popular choice, but it is possible. It might take you saying ‘no’ to what feels good in the moment because you have a vision of something greater. You know that if you follow the rules God set up for sex that one day you’ll experience an awesome sexual relationship.

If you haven’t already made a decision to be sexually pure, we encourage you to do it. It won’t be the popular decision. It won’t be the easiest decision, but it will be a decision that will leave you with no regrets. It will make your life easier in the long run. And if you’ve not made the decision to be sexually pure, and you’ve already plunged into sexual relationships, take a minute and make a decision to be sexually pure from this point forward. Determine to not let peer pressure, the media and other things determine your sexual choices. Let God be the one who sets the standard for sex. Follow after God’s plan for sex and you’ll be glad you did!


Every Teenager’s Little Black Book on Sex & Dating
This book is awesome especially if you don’t like reading very much! It is a very quick read and has tons of great information on sex and dating.

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What Does it Really Mean To Love Others?

Youth Devotion - PrayerYou’ve probably heard at church or youth group at some point that you should love others. But you may have wondered, what does that look like? What does it really mean to love others, and what does it look like to love your enemy?

The answer to that question, is that love looks different. It looks different than what you see on TV. It looks different than what you hear in the hallways at school. True love, the way God meant it, looks way different than the way we see it portrayed. Many times, the definition of love on TV or school goes something like this: I’ll love you if you can do something for me, or if you can give something to me. However, this isn’t the meaning of loving others that the Bible describes.

This is love: not that we have loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son to be the payment for our sins.  – 1 John 4:10(God’s Word)
This verse in 1 John describes love as something different than what we see at school and on TV. It shows us that God defines love differently. God didn’t wait for us to be able to give Him something for Him to love us. God loved us first. He loved us and gave before we even knew Him. Then God challenges us to take the love He gave to us and show that love to others.

Loving others isn’t based upon how others treat us. Its based on God’s love and grace which empowers us to then love others. We are to love others and value them, not because they have done anything to deserve it, but because its the example God showed us first. Dietrich Bonhoeffer says it this way:

“The Christian must treat his enemy as a brother, and requite his hostility with love. His behavior must be determined not by the way others treat him, but by the treatment he himself receives from Jesus; it has only one source, and that is the will of Jesus.”
― Dietrich Bonhoeffer

So choose to love others. Treat them with respect and love, not based on what they can do for you, or how they treat you, but rather based on how God treated us!

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How to Know If You’re In Love

Youth Devotion - Being in Love

It can be hard to know if the relationship you’re in is “IT”. Is this true love? Are you in love with your boyfriend or girlfriend? How do you know if they’re the “ONE”?

It can be challenging to decide if you’re in love with the person that you’re dating. We’ve got a few things that should help you determine if what you’re experiencing is true love.

  1. Can You Accomplish something together? – If you had a history presentation to put together for class tomorrow would you be able to accomplish this task together? Or would someone end up mad at the other or have their feelings hurt? If your goal is a relationship that lasts and true love, you’d better pay attention to whether or not you guys can accomplish something together as a team.
  2. What do you like about the other person? – Be realistic and honest about this question. What do you like about the other person. If you come up with things like, you like the way their hair looks or the color of their eyes, chances are, you have a relationship based on the physical, not upon something deeper. While you should be attracted to the person that you will ultimately marry, you should have more things that you like about that person than just the physical.
  3. How Physical is your relationship? – Its easy to confuse hormones with love. You may be attracted to the person you’re dating and want to be close to them. You may enjoy the butterflies and feelings that you get when you’re around them. However, this is never a good indicator of love. Relationships based on physical attraction don’t last. You’ve got be able to separate attraction from love.
  4. Do you look out for the other person’s best interests? – If you’re in the relationship because the person you’re dating makes you feel good, you’re in it for the wrong reasons. You need to be willing to help the other person and be on the lookout for their interests.
  5. Does your relationship pull you closer to God? – Does the person you’re dating love God like you? Does being with them make you love God more. If not, run for your life. This is not true love and it is not a relationship that will last.

There are many indicators of true love in a relationship. If for any reason, your relationship doesn’t pass any of the conditions mentioned above you need to take a good look at your relationship. Its probably not one based on true love.

Also, if you’re not old enough to drive and don’t have a job, you’re probably not ready to date or fall in love. This might seem harsh, but it is true. Falling in love is not something to take lightly. You would hate to fall in love with the wrong person and end up with a broken heart and broken relationships. There is some wisdom to waiting and getting some life experience.

The main thing in determining if your relationship is the “Real Deal” is to ask God. He’ll be able to help you and show you if your relationship is one you should continue or one to end. Ask God for his direction and advice and you’ll find that you’ll enjoy your relationships even more.